Still No Word

It is 2:19 a.m. in Tel Aviv and the jetlag is in full swing. I awoke about 30 minutes ago and about 2 minutes later I knew I was up for a while. 

A few minutes after that I realized my phone is in airplane mode and I wouldn't have heard the doctor call if she did. My whole body started to buzz as I felt anxiety wash over me.

Would the doctor leave a message? What if she called since I went to sleep at 9:30, overcome by exhaustion and there is a message to call back? Worse, what if there is a message to call back quickly? Would a doctor leave such a message? I was down the rabbit hole.

I needed to turn on the phone to stop the madness in my head (does anybody remeber the "Stop the Insanity!" lady? I think of her yelling every time I say 'Stop the Madness' even though I am misquoting).

Airplane mode off. No messages. Luckily if she did call with results there is no evidence. Thank you, God! That would drive me crazy all day--I'd have to wait until 5 p.m. for it to be 8 a.m. in Austin. As it is, I am going to call the today at 8 a.m. anyways office to check.

I am still fully exhausted and fully awake. I am going to turn on the TCU/Georgia National Championship and hope I drift off while I lay here. It is not good for me to be alone foe too long with my thoughts between midnight and 4 a.m.

Go Horned Frogs!!

Comments

  1. Jeff CreedJanuary 10, 2023 at 4:22 AM

    So stressful! Eek! rest/food/water, is my general plan, I will even schedule. The longer they wait to call the less of a critical rush to treat. So, you will get the news when the news arrives, torture! I have had it two ways so far, once they called me on my cellphone before even home from the test/procedure. The other, they waited 3 weeks to tell me. One was an immediate surgery, the other was, well we want to operated in perhaps the next year. Its a triage, deep breathes. I know that really does nothing for the stress level. When I am emotionally spinning, I try box breathes. In hale for 3 counts, hold for 3 counts, exhale for 3 counts, hold on empty for 3 counts. then repeats. Then there is spicy food. Hard to worse when your mouth is on fire. (Hug)

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousJanuary 12, 2023 at 5:45 PM

    Thinking of you Jill! Sorry you have to be going thru this worry right now! 🙏

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Biopsy

Image
 The sterostactic biopsy was scheduled for Wednesday morning at 10:30 and I was to arrive at 9:45. My mom agreed to go with me although no one was allowed to go with me to the procedure (like my friend Kelli who held my hand and talked for 45 minutes straight when I had an MRI). I felt calm but as I did each task I got a little more nervous. Mom and in front of the ARA Imaging clinic When the nurse called me back I immediately told her I have some questions I'd like to ask the doctor before we do the procedure. She cheerfully  said, "no problem." We sat down in a little office and she asked first what my questions are, so that she could tell the doctor and he could get ready to talk to me. I told her my concerns and she stepped out to relay to the doctor. The one question she did  answer was, Is this guy a good doctor?  Her response was reassuring: "I love him! He's the one she would pick to do a procedure on her." After she took my vital signs we walked to
Read more